Wednesday, September 27, 2006
farhanah! farhanah! a must watch video for the both of us!
i thought gackt was holding the violin! gackt has created look-alikes for his band. gackt-job, i suppose! not freaky but extremely fresh!
go tidus! nope, i mean gackt! his lives are as perfect as his cd quality! good singer and looker! love him~~~ but although he is good at his flexibility, don't expect much from his muscle coordination... lol
7:31 PM
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
wow... just noticed how pissed off i was on the last entry.. thats how moodswings can be a great deal at times. but now, i just want to type something random... feel kinda poetic now.
you led me in
i was blinded by the rays of the warm sunshine
i smiled to myself
it was the first sensation of warmth
i was once embedded within deep darkness
shivering, reaching out with my frail body
screamed till my voice left me
curled up within a corner, numb
gave up my hopes of being freed
turned and there it was
a smile that showed no fear
a simple expression that was robbed from me
you showed it with ease
how is it so?
jewels of tears dropped from my swollen eyes
the frail life that i once clung on
again, re-ignited with warmth
a strong pair of arms reaching in
i mustered the little strength i had,
and reached out
cherished my life as if i were a greedy kid
just because you were here
breaking free from the abyss
i saw the first rays of light
a pair of gleaming eyes turned to me
i smiled
i once wondered
how great it was
if i met someone who picked me up
as if i were some delicate dandelion
and put me in his hands
cherishing me
i smiled to myself
being all foolish and child-like
thank you
for being here
jewels of tears flowed down my cheeks
down the pink cheeks that were glowing with life
i was crying for joy, you see
happiness was all i felt
you returned me with a saccharine smile
thank you
just because you were here
pls give credits to me if you like my work or you are uploading it to somewhere... pls tag my board if you like this masterpiece... i cried when i was penning this and hearing a sad song.
9:05 AM
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
boy, i'm super pissed now. i came to the computer and so here i'm gonna bitch about it. disclaimer: shift your mouse cursor to the X button on the top right corner of your screen to shut down this window before you regret it.
and so, as usual i woke up today. but i was later by 2 hours and i thought it is alright since it was the holidays and i can leave my household chores till slightly later since i won't be heading off to any place in particular later.
read a message from my mum.. i'm not saying that i hate broken english but whatever was it that she meant?! i did not even figure out what she was talking about and completely gave up... i think my mum typed the message half-heartedly since her english standard should be okay for my comprehension. putting down my phone, i thought i might as well go eat some breakfast.
called out to my grannie, 'good 'morn!'.
she said that i was a Da Xiao Jie, taking like eons to wake up. and as much as i want to shut her up, she started rattling her instructions to me. something to highlight about this part.. it is the lunar seventh month, the 14th. so we had some praying sessions and insense burning to do. i'm not saying that i don't give a damn to my elders but i did not sell my soul to them. and there they were instructing as if i was worse off than some maid. i have my own temperament, you know?
this is the last straw. picture this.. you are some miserable lil' puppy and some people come along and use a pole to keep pushing you. you like it? if you like it, you must be some SM maniac waiting to be tortured.
and here i am in my holidays. drained in all the housework every day. i can't do the things i want. my siblings can do what they want. i can't. my brothers just shirk off any responsibilities even it may occur to them that one is on holiday but they went working and another is schooling. i did housework to lessen the burden on my mother initially but that does not mean i am any pushover. i did such things out of goodwill only. and people, stop taking things for granted. i'm on the verge of picking up smoking.. so don't you push me to the edge.. Great MFs.
8:51 PM
i guess it is due to myself being slightly free than compared to the past. hmm, nothing much happened recently.. but i noticed myself having sudden mood swings as of late.
so you can say that i have recovered a reat deal that i have nothing much to say.
chalet is this friday.. but i keep forgeting. its not as if i don't make a point to remember but it seems that my memory for upcoming events is not that strong. sorry for that peeps... update another time
8:28 AM
Friday, September 01, 2006
the current me? i would say that i am unsure as to what exactly i am going to do next. maybe i have sold my soul to youtube.. have been sitting in front of the computer screen watching.. boy, i really must limit myself.
apart from doing household chores nowadays, its like work and cca. can't say i sold my soul to the devils but i must grab my stand soon... been feeling lazy every now and then... you know something? the only satisfaction comes when my famiy members gobble down the food i cooked. hey no kidding.. pay me and i'll cook for you... but no charges for my family though..
i think the partial me was blinded by some stress that came from my surroundings.. how do you say it? i think it is due to the fact that i can't be doing what i can be doing. not that i dislike doing all the household chores, its more like having my wings clipped. i can't express it better than this sentence. the only time i can have to myself is sadly when i am alone at night. i appreciate the short break that i dedicate to myself... doing the things i want, following my heart to anywhere in the world...
hmm... currently hyde's 'cape of storms' is playing through the speakers.. i have a deep feeling that the song is echoeing my current self. have i lost myself? maybe yeah, but i will get myself back asap. i promise. this is a promise i make to myself... maybe it is due to the fact that i haven't been true to myself...
nothing much... just a random post to talk to myself.. don't read too much into it
10:08 AM
hmm... *stretches lazily* have been tagged to do this... by that dragon.. but just a disclaimer i won't be requesting any of you to do this... darn lame... (oiy. dragon, dun take this personally!)
FAVOURITES:
colour: black (not really considered a colour though)
food: milk tea
song: Glamorous Sky and Endless Story
movie: NANA the movie
sport: nil
Season: Autumn
ice-cream: Vanilla
CURRENT:
mood: bewildered-as-to-how-i-should-feel mood
taste: water
clothes: PJs
desktop: hyde stuff and blog
time: 12.34 a.m
surroundings: sound from CPU
annoyance: Evil twin is talking
thoughts: Why am i so lazy?
FIRSTS:
best friend: toon ling and angeline
crush: i guess i have forgotten about him
movie: Beauty and the Beast.. i was real young then
lie: nope.. haven't been doing so in a while
music: L'arc en ciel's
LASTS:
cigarette: i haven't tried it yet :)
drink: Water
ride: taxi ride home
crush: nah.. don't wanna touch men for the time being
movie: NANA the movie
phonecall: someone who made a wrong call. hah!
CD: ken hirai's 10 year compilation
HAVE YOU EVER:
dated one of ur best friends: ain't lesbian i guess
been arrested: nah..
skinny-dipped: nah
been on tv: i guess so
kissed someone you dunno: i won't do such brainless acts
THINGS:
4 things i did today:
- household chores
- youtube
- eat
- rot
4 sounds u can hear right now:
- CPU noise
- Hyde's taiwanese interview
- typing
- hyde's exclamation :)
yeah yeah... nothing much le...
9:13 AM
